Wednesday, March 2, 2011

V S2E8: Uneasy Lies the Head

This is a totally gratuitous thumbnail, but then again, so was this episode.

The stench of desperation is seeping through our screen as we watch this show. It seems like every week, they pile on some new plot point or scheme without ever really resolving any of the previous ones, resulting in an enormous pile of information, very little of which makes sense to the viewer. Red rain, phosphorus, DNA, souls, something-something the Vatican, breeding schemes, Tyler is special; oh wait, no he's not, there are 29 more just like him; hold that thought, they're all spewing cherry Slurpees and dying; DNA bombs, Diana and her big bag of bullshit, Ryan and his big bag of bullshit, Ryan's loudmouthed baby, some earth kid with a high immune system, blue energy, Lisa and her goddamn indecisiveness, Anna's secret egg, Hobbs is working with the Vs, so is Ryan, oh, maybe not; meet Chad's co-host, who gets a big introduction and then disappears from the story; meet the leader of the 5th Column; oh, he's dead, but he names Erica his replacement, but the other leaders might not like her, but then they do.

And that's just in the last 7 episodes. We'd do a little recap of the events last night here, but frankly, so little of it made sense and felt like it was coming out of nowhere that we didn't care. Especially since they'll probably ignore everything that happened here and reveal yet ANOTHER set of plans or plot point next week.

They are throwing everything they have at the wall to see if it'll stick and the whiplash, lack of commitment to the storyline or characters, and general lack of respect for the audience have turned us off completely by now. Which is funny, because we honestly did think this was a decent episode with a modicum of excitement and movement. Although really, it's the same old V of people talking about stuff they're going to do and then talking about stuff they just did, with no real change to the status quo by the end. Plus, in their desperation, the writers are asking us to swallow an awful lot of bullshit. It's bad enough a spaceship has a secret cellar that no one knows about even though the entrance to it is right out in a public space. Now they're expecting us to believe that Diana somehow "hid" a shuttlecraft on the ship for the last 15 years. Anna's proving to be a ridiculously stupid leader through all these story convolutions and that's perhaps the biggest shame of all. Morena Baccarin, who gave the show its initial jolt of interest by portraying Anna as a cool but brilliant schemer, is now chewing the virtual scenery with every line. Her eyes and nostrils flare with each pronouncement and she barks orders or seethes at setbacks through gritted teeth. The only thing that separates her from Alexis Carrington is a turban, some maribou mules, and a couple of Champagne glasses. We said early in the season that the show could do with a little campy fun to give it some spark, but this isn't what we meant.

Also, could someone shoot Tyler in the head? Or just have him spew the pink shit out of his mouth and call it a day with this character.

And finally, that drearily shot and performed sex scene was groan-worthy because it felt like the most desperate act of all. Abs and boobs and hands down the pants; they'll do anything at this point to get a green light for next season and it shows. Brace yourselves for the season finale, when Diana reveals her own mother, Betty White, hidden in yet another secret, empty CGI room in this massively stupid space ship.


[Picture credit: ABC TV]


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